Resilience Development in Action

E.229 How First Responders Can Process Trauma Without Burning Out (Part 2 of 2)

Steve Bisson, Stephanie Simpson Season 12 Episode 229

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The hardest part isn’t the call. It’s what your body and mind carry after the sirens fade. We go straight at the myth that strength means silence, and trade it for a practical blueprint to complete the stress cycle, name emotions without fancy language, and rebuild trust through honest conversation.

Stephanie Simpson continues to share simple, fast tools first responders can use to process stress on and off scene. We break down why compartmentalizing is necessary in the moment but corrosive if it becomes a lifestyle, and how two-minute rituals—like shaking out the limbs, breath-led resets, or a quick run—help your nervous system return to baseline. When words are hard, we turn to creativity: playlists that mirror your mood, drawing the shape and color of tension, and short journaling bursts that expand emotional vocabulary over time. These practices aren’t woo; they are physiology and practicality for police, fire, EMS, dispatch, and anyone supporting them.

We also dig into the social side of resilience. Isolation plus workouts can numb; venting without boundaries can spiral. The solution is blending self-soothing with smart connection: candid debriefs, dark humor in safe rooms, and mentors who normalize not knowing. Stephanie explains how coaching pairs with therapy to create forward action, using energy leadership to help you lead your life with intention. For leaders and rookies alike, vulnerability becomes a performance advantage—fewer avoidable errors, tighter teams, and a lighter hidden load.

If you’re ready to replace “I’m fine” with tools that actually work, hit play. Then share this with your crew, subscribe for more conversations like this, and leave a review to help other first responders find these resources. Got a post-shift ritual that helps you reset? Tell us—we want to hear what works on your line.

You can reach Stephanie the following ways: 

Website - www.stephanie-simpson.com   
LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/stephaniesimpsoncoaching/  
Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/stephaniesimpsoncoaching/
Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/StephanieSimpsonCoaching

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SPEAKER_01:

You're listening to Resilience Development in Action with Steve Bisson. We're here to strengthen first responder mental health, supporting police, fire, EMS, dispatchers, and paramedics as they build resilience and thrive in high-stress careers.

SPEAKER_00:

Let's dive in.ai. You heard me talk about it. I'm gonna keep on talking about it because I love it. I've had about a year and a half, 18 months practice with it, and I still enjoy it. And it saves me time and it saves me energy. Free.ai takes your note, makes a trans what you're talking about a client, just press record. And it does either transcript, it does a subjective, and an objective with a letter if needed for your client. And for whoever might need it. So for$99 a month, it saves me so much time that it's worthwhile. And if you do it for a whole year, guess what? You get 10% off. More importantly, this is what you got. Because you are my audience that listens to Resilience Development in Action. If you do listen to this and you want to use free.ai, put in the code Steve50 in the promo code area. Steve 50. And you will get$50 off in addition to everything we just talked about. Get free from writing your notes. Get free from even writing your transcripts. Use that to your advantage. Free.ai, a great service. Go to get free.ai and you will get one of the best services that will save you time and money. And I highly encourage you to do so. Welcome. And this is the part two episode of episode 229. Stephanie Simpson, go listen to the one on Wednesday so you can get her name and everything else. Because we're in the middle of a great conversation here. Uh, because we really turned to stress and trauma and how to deal with it. We talked about emotions, but we went into stress and trauma. And you talked about your experience of teaching future first responders, which I really, really appreciate. One of the things that the first thing that comes to mind is this if I dispose if I display stress, I'm obviously weak. What do you say to that?

SPEAKER_02:

Can I answer this in a different way? Because talking about my students, so one of the first weeks, I think it's the second week, I have them do a discussion board post where they talk about like what they think their current relationship with stress is. And when I read those, there's always, always a handful, if not more, people that say, oh, I'm really good. Like I don't really have a lot of stress in my life. Like I'm really good at dealing with stress. And that to me is always a ding-ding-ding.

SPEAKER_00:

Correct.

SPEAKER_02:

Because I'm like, oh you, there's something like you, you either have not actually acknowledged what the actual stressors are and you're now just avoiding everything, or you actually don't understand what stress really is, which to be honest, most people don't. That's like first most people actually don't know what stress is. So that's the first part of the semester is like, let's get really clear on what stress is and is not, and like the different layers and like what we're calling things and what's actually happening in the body, what's happening hormonally, all of that. And then it's as we go through the semester checking in with those people where they're like, oh, actually, yeah, like I don't deal with emotions at all, or I just, you know, whatever it may be. So that's always a really interesting in like indication to me when someone says something like that. I will say I feel like it tends to be, I don't know, there's there's actually a lot of factors. I wouldn't say it's always male or female. I do think it tends to skew a little male, but there's also cultural things around it, like and so many other things, and and culture can mean a lot of things. It can mean, you know, the culture of the work environment that you're in and all of that. And and with first responders, one of the things that I've noticed is like, in order to be good at your job, you actually do need to know how to like compartmentalize and like shut down certain aspects. Like that is actually necessary in order to be effective in the job. And the other aspect of it is like, but then where are you putting all of that afterwards? Because it's not sustainable to continue to compartmentalize and because that's actually going to be a problem down the line. So I think about like animals, like certain animals, when they go through the stress cycle, right? They do their stress thing because they need to get to safety. And then afterwards, they literally convulse and shake it all out so that the actual stress hormones and everything like that leave their body. So then they can go on and prance around or whatever they do, you know, their daily life. But us as humans, we haven't been taught how to do that. And so in we don't ever, I shouldn't say we don't ever, but a lot of us don't actually get to the shakeout part of it so that we come back to a regulated place. We just are continuously reactivating ourselves and then shutting down to do the thing and then reactivating ourselves. And so that over time is it literally is not sustainable.

SPEAKER_00:

There's so many things you just said that I really want to react to. I want to give you the um the whole shaking thing. I remember you talking about in the previous podcast with Courtney from Manowski, our our sometimes co-host here on resilience development in action. We were talking about literally shake it off, Steve. And I remember, and again, you know how much I love Courtney, you know how much I love you. And I'm like, yeah, whatever. The first time I did, I'm like, holy crap, this works. And I tell you right now that there's days where if I had a hard session with someone, I close the door and I shake it off, and people are like, Really? I'm like, yeah, shake, literally, shake my body. And for some reason it really grounds me. And I think that there's probably some biological explanation to that. But it's a good advice that I give to some of my guys and gals that I work with because you literally got to go like go in the other room, shake it off literally for a minute or two. And if it's only twice, it's twice. Who cares? But it will reground you. So I want to share that as not only did you make an impact on me and Courtney made an impact on me, I usually use it, and some of my guys and gals have heard it.

SPEAKER_02:

I love that. I love that. And there is a biological thing, and it's it's well, because you're moving things around in the body, right? And another interesting thing that typically this is kind of more of a gendered thing, is men tend to like isolate and then like go work out or something. And like, and that's fine. Like the working out part is really great. The isolation, not so great, right? Women tend to tend and befriend, so they immediately go to a bunch of people and share their thing and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, which also can be really great because you're getting that connection and that social support. It also can not be so great depending on who you're sharing with, because they can actually layer on and then create more stress, right? And so what I like to share with any of my clients, but also my students, is like, how are you doing a both and like how are you learning how to self-soothe? And how are you literally shaking or going to the gym or I'm a runner? So like going for a run or whatever you might do, right? To physically get out, though also how are you connecting with people who can be that support for you? But doing a both and, because we do need all of that, and doing an extreme of one or the other is also not going to be super helpful.

SPEAKER_00:

Well, I was gonna piggyback on what you just said. No, it's not sexist or anything else. But the truth is, men do that, women do that. And to me, one of the things that I find is with men in particular, they really go into all or nothing brain. I work out, I'm fine. No, you're not. You're still a little fucked up, but you need to address that. And then with women, is they go what I call kibbutzing with other people. And now suddenly they bring up, oh, did you think about this? And now suddenly your anxiety goes even higher because you shared your feelings. Um call me sexist, I'm fine write me, write me bad things too. I'm okay with that. But I think I'm fairly accurate. And I didn't say every man, I didn't say every woman. I'm just saying a general statement that's probably accurate. I think that it's important to point out those differences of communication because that's how we're gonna deal with stress and trauma appropriately. I'm an emotional guy. I have no problem saying that I am. But when my clients are opening up about stuff, I don't kind of like break down. I'm able to handle it. But I also, my daughters and will tell you, oh, he's a big emotional ball. Uh, and I'm okay with them thinking that if that's the worst they could ever say about me, I'll let myself. But I think that the bringing back a little bit to the stress and the trauma, one of the things you also mentioned is, you know, dealing with it on a regular basis with your emotions and acknowledging. Sometimes people don't know how to put it in words. I mean, it's easy to talk about certain things, but like the words are very difficult. So like right now, I'm trying to formulate a good question that I can't formulate, but I'm acknowledging that I'm having trouble. But it it's really explaining like when you've never had uh acknowledgement of fear, you're not able to talk about fear. I had a client today who came in and said, Oh, I don't have any anxiety, I said, So you're dead. And they laughed exactly like that. And I'm like, No, we have anxiety, you just don't like to talk about it.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

So how do we explain people? Like, I I hate definitions, and what I mean by that is if I ask Stephanie what the definition of sadness is, they'll probably be similar yet a little different than mine. And both are valid. That doesn't mean one's better than the other, it just means it's different. So, how do we help people identify those emotions when it's hard to put in in words, period?

SPEAKER_02:

I fully agree with that, and I'm gonna share my thoughts, also knowing the audience that this might be a little out there. But um, to me, that's where some of like the arts come in. Cause at the end of the day, we are all creative beings, like we just are. And whether people consider themselves spiritual, religious, or not, like being a whole person, creativity is part of that. I do believe that like the arts world has somewhat like made it be that like in order to be creative, you have to be talented. And I want to be very clear that those in my world are separate. Everyone is creative. That does not necessarily mean that you need to be a talented dancer, artist, singer, or whatever, but we all are creative beings because creativity is self-expression, right? So I typically find with clients that that there is something. There is something that they enjoy doing, whether that's cooking, whether that is decorating, whether that is drawing or writing poetry or um singing or dancing or whatever it may be, there is some way that they like to express themselves, right? And so when I can figure out what that is with a client, then it's moving in that direction with them, right? And and finding a way to, if it's music, right? It doesn't need to be like I'm a singer, but if it's music, it's like, great, what's like create a playlist that is a bunch of songs that's representative of how you're feeling right now. And then they're creating that playlist. And then we like listen to the playlist. And then it's like, okay, what is it about these songs that you're getting connected to? Cause then I think the challenge sometimes for people, myself included, is like, it's like, what am I? I don't know. I can't express it, blah, blah, blah. But there are these other things out there that are resonating with us. So if it's a song, it's like, okay, well, what about this song? And it's like, well, I really love this one lyric. And then I love how like the drum comes in here, and then I love how this happens. Cool. Well, now we can talk about them and through them and through me being trained how to listen to people and ask questions, all of a sudden we're starting to unearth what the actual feelings are, right? Or drawing or, you know, shaping. I mentioned in the part one of this of I do a lot of work where I'll ask people like, where are you feeling a sensation in your body? And if they're like, I don't know what that means, I'll be like, where are you feeling tightness in your body? Right. Right. Because that's what stress does is it creates a tightness, right? So it's like whether that's my shoulder or my stomach or my back. And then I go, great. Now, if this was the shape, what shape is that tightness? What color is it? What is this? What is that? Blah, blah, blah. So again, we're, we're, we're creating distance from it, right? And then from there, I'll start saying, like, well, when you're looking at this, like what type of emotions might be coming up? Or what are you thinking when this comes up? I think that's one, these are different ways to get into it. Again, I think the theme of all of it is how can we, how can we get distance from it? That it's not uh, it's not me, it's this other thing, because I do think we as human beings are really good at analyzing other things. Um, but when it comes to ourselves, that's more challenging. So that's kind of how I work with it.

SPEAKER_00:

I think that it's a great way to break because music is international. I mean, I tell people that you go to the most urban person place in the world versus the most isolated jungle tribe that you can possibly imagine. You know what they all have in common? Music. And so music tells a whole lot in, you know, in in America or the Western culture, I should say. I always remind people if you listen to a certain type of music, there's gotta be something about it that has an emotional attachment to it.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, totally.

SPEAKER_00:

So I talk about that. So it's not woo-woo, if you ask me, and to bring back even my first responder people, if they kind of didn't get it, let me explain it very differently. When you go get a call and they say, All right, unresponsive uh person would a pulse if someone's on scene to open the door. What's your first thought that happened? Well, they create 17 different scenarios, including the worst case scenario. I said, so therefore you are creative. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

You just wrote 17 episodes of a TV show.

SPEAKER_00:

And you get there and turns out the person was just passed out and got up, and they're fine, and they just need a quick medical before they go away. It could have been also a scene where there was poison. Um you never know. But you create all these scenarios in order to make yourself safe, and that's creativeness. Learning to be creative about yourself, whether it's through music or supporting each other. And yes, for those who go to my group, thank you very much. Yes, journaling. We we all joke around, but most of them privately have told me that they've journaled and they find it very helpful.

SPEAKER_02:

You know, I want to just give a shout out to this too, because uh, in addition to teaching a stress management class at John Jay, I also teach a yoga class. Um and many of the people take yoga not because they want to, but because it's one credit and they're like, oh crap, I need a credit to graduate, right? So I get a lot of different types of students coming into this, most of them not wanting to be a yogi, right? And I'm very clear with them up front that I'm like, I also did not like yoga for many years. And every time it came into my life, I was like, hell no, absolutely not in all of this. And then all of a sudden it came into my life at another point where it clicked and it worked and like has now become a big part of my life for the last over a decade. In the way that I teach this yoga class now, it's a three-hour course because we see each other once a week for just three hours. We do the like physical practice, which is the asana practice at the beginning. But then we do, we also actually start with a community question. So everyone has to answer this question in small groups and everything. So we're learning how to listen and talk to each other. And they're fun things like if you were an ingredient of a salad, what would you be and why? And like fun things like that, which is also getting people to think creatively. But then after break, we do, we read what's called the Yoga Sutras and then they journal. And I, and many of them at the beginning were like, I hate journaling. I don't want to journal, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, totally, that's understandable. And I'm going, it's an expectation of this class. You don't have to actually answer the questions I'm asking you to journal. Like, but I do need you to spend the next 10 minutes, and we always do 10 minutes writing. If that means you want to draw instead of write, if it's random words, I'm okay with that. You're never gonna hand it in to me. And then you're gonna get into small groups and you're gonna discuss what came up. And over the last few weeks, because we're like halfway through the semester now, I cannot tell you how many of them were like, I really hated journaling, but this has actually been really refreshing and it's been really interesting. And I just have never thought to pause and think about some of these questions you're asking us to think about, and then to be able to share with other people. And the biggest takeaway, and this is the thing that like warms my heart the most, is that they all go at every at the end of every class and in the stress management class too, because we do a lot of like reflecting, sharing with a small group, then big group, is they all then say, it feels really good to know that I'm not the only one thinking and feeling this way. It feels really good to know that like I'm not the only one struggling with X, Y, and Z. It feels really good to know that like all these like wild thoughts that I have that stop me from doing the thing that I want to do or like saying hi to the person over there, whatever is like universal. And going back to like what I said in the first episode about like what really drew me to doing this work was how do we create these spaces where people feel more supported? I don't use the word comfortable because we're not always comfortable in these spaces, but how do we feel supported to be able to get some of this stuff out and up and out and then connect with other people? Because if we're not doing that, like we're all doomed, to be honest, right? And it's it is such, I mean, that in itself is they leave the classes feeling better because they've connected with other people in a way that was real. There's definitely some vulnerability in there, but they're allowed to share to their own comfort level. And and that, like that to me, I'm just like, how do we get more spaces like that for everybody?

SPEAKER_00:

Right. And I think that, you know, I was right wrote down, I can't remember which academy around here says this, but one of the first lessons is be comfortable with being uncomfortable. And I think that that's goes for a lot of my first responders. But I think in general, even writing for myself and my journal or anything else, I gotta be uncomfortable to write some stuff and be okay with that because it will get comfortable eventually until it's not, and that's okay too. And being able to do that is so important. So I like your message there. But more importantly, I think that I have a group that I run with first responders only. And most of the guys who come in and gals who come in are like, oh, I'm so not alone that people think like me. And that's usually the first message. The other part that I think is uh helpful for them too is they get to have their very uncomfortable gallows humor, dark humor, whatever the hell you want to call it. And everyone laughs and they're like, Oh, so I'm not only alone, I can feel this way, and it's natural. I think that that's the key because we try to abnormalize ourselves constantly. And you talk about our inner voice, we get uncomfortable with ourselves, but then we want to normalize it by squashing it the hardest we can, which is really screwy, if you ask me.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, and then we're not we're not being our authentic self, which then creates another type of internal distress, which is the bad stress, right? Because then it's like, I don't get to be me. And and then it that's not good either. And so it's like, how do we find the spaces where we get to be our whole selves and supported to doing that? And then, and I mean, I will say this too, is like it's really vulnerable to be your whole self in front of people. So yeah, I just will name that it it can be really scary.

SPEAKER_00:

Well, I think that it's not about being your whole self, honestly. I think it's about people who don't want to hear certain things. I think being ourselves is not is not hard per se. But when I have to say, hey, listen, I don't know the answer to your therapy question, but I'll look into it. That's super vulnerable and that's difficult because I'm supposed to be quote, the expert. Look at all my website, by the way, and everything else. Expert never shows up in my notes because I don't believe in that. But that's the vulnerability that's hard. If Steph called me and was having a hard time, sometimes I won't know what to say. And now I gotta be, oh my God, I told her she could call. No, you don't need to be that being truthful about yourself is saying, Steph, I wish I had the right words for you, I just don't. And that's vulnerable to say because that makes you feel like, oh my god, what's gonna happen? Is that gonna break the relationship or not? Fact of the matter is people are much more comforted by truth than they are about an all-knowing human being. I think that that's one of the roles we end up playing in our lives privately and in uh in our job. And that's why I tell people like, you don't know everything, and that's okay. There's nothing wrong with that. And I think that's part of the vulnerability that people don't want to display.

SPEAKER_02:

I yeah, I love that. It yes, because even in leadership, and I do a lot of work on like leadership development and like coaching like executives, that is actually the narrative that we're trying to shift a lot, is that just because you're a CEO or a C-suite level doesn't mean you're the expert. And actually that's not going to help you continue to be successful. Like, how can you say, I don't know, but let's find out together or let me go ask questions or whatever. That, but that's a very vulnerable thing. And it reminds me of like, I don't remember the question you fully asked about stress at the beginning of this section, but you were like, what would you say if someone was like, oh, stressed? I forget how it was, but it was that it's a similar sort of thing of like saying, like, yeah, I'm gonna have stress and I actually don't know how to handle it all the time, but I'm working on it. That must feel very vulnerable, right? And also for all of us, it's actually the truth, right? Like we all are trying, because just I try to remind people too is like the thing that stressed you out today might happen again tomorrow, but tomorrow you're showing up a little differently than you were today. So the way that you dealt with it today may be different and needs to be different tomorrow. You actually don't, you're it's like work in progress all the time, which can feel very vulnerable because it also means you don't have a lot of control. And so saying I don't know is actually saying, like, I don't know, and I don't have control over how this is gonna go, but I'm okay with figuring it out with you.

SPEAKER_00:

And I think that that's that's where I've learned to be more vulnerable, so to speak, in my life. Because you know what how much pressure it took off me? Because when you got to be an all-knowing fire uh freaking person is exhaust exhaust, exhausting. So exhaust you know, like and I think that that's one of the other things about first responders, and I think even your C-suite people have all the time. You gotta be all knowing, but then you carry the stress, like, I don't know what I fucking just said, and I feel like in a mute, and like I didn't mean what I meant, and I didn't mean what I said or whatever. And I'm like, that's why you need to be able to be vulnerable and say what you don't know, because that's strong. You're a police officer, you're a firefighter, you're on scene, and you want to be able to control that scene. I'm fine with that. But if there was things you weren't sure about, talk about it afterwards, whether it's with your someone you trust, uh sergeant that is a good person, a mentor, you know, someone someone who helped you train. I mean, I they have all different names now across the states, but I think that's the vulnerability that we lack. And for me, it's one of those things that I've learned to, like I said to you privately before we started. I think as I grow older, I care even less because I just think that if you know, with all with how I've dealt with life, I just people will see me and first and they'll be like, Oh, you are the same person. And you know, that's kind of like it takes away from having to put up a uh front or whatever about this all-knowing or controlled or whatever. No, I'm as screwed up as the next person. It's just how it is.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, you know what when you were saying this and and really thinking about first responders and and and thinking about stress is like that is a stressful job, no matter how you put it, right? That is just it is. And the way that you respond to it afterwards, it can can be healthy or unhealthy, right? And so one of the things that I was hearing from you too is like there are times where like you have to take control of something, but then you're also not gonna know everything. And how are we how are we creating spaces afterwards to be able to debrief that if we want to say a logistical term, so that we can ask questions and that being vulnerable is actually what builds trust and connection with people. And at the end of the day, you want to be able to trust the people that you're working with, right? And and we just think about other things in your people in your life. You trust them because they were open and vulnerable and you were open and vulnerable and you got each other's back and you're figuring it out together, right? And and it feels counterintuitive, and yet that is actually how like trusted relationships are built is that you go through these like uncomfortable, mucky times and storming, conflicty times, but you do it together, you and and you share and you listen and all of that to get to a place of like, okay, I know this person has my back. I know this, so I feel comfortable, and and then you're better at your job.

SPEAKER_00:

Right. And I think that it goes back to I I had a guest a few weeks ago who talked about mentorship. And I think we've lost that art in all, like, particularly, we'll talk about first responders, but even in our field, I had one hell of a mentor, and um, he never asked for a dime and he was vulnerable with me when he didn't know. And um, I I will always be grateful to Dennis. I'm in his office now. I took over his office just because of the and I left his chair there because that's his chair, and I'm gonna always leave it there. He retired. Uh, but I think that's the other part too, but we don't learn to be vulnerable because we don't have these people we can turn to, whether it's a mentor or someone we can trust. And that's the other big part is trust. You know, Stephanie and I tend to have like a half-hour conversation before these things because we catch up. But there's a lot of stuff that, you know, she told me that are meant in confidentiality. I'm not sharing here. And that's what she meant. And I gained that trust by showing that. And hey, she gave me advice. I hope I gave her some advice, and some of it's good, some of it may not be bad for their lives. But ultimately, I think that's the other part too, is having that one person you can trust, whether it's a mentor, trainer, or whatever. And I like to think that my colleagues, uh, and I particularly turn to you, uh, Courtney, who's obviously someone you know that I can turn to and go, I don't know. And they don't go to that and go, oh my God, what's wrong with you? But they go, happy. Right. And I I've mentored many people, and there's nothing like getting a phone call from them and say, Hey, I need help with this. And if I can help them, I can. If I can't, I tell them I don't know, and I'll look for the answer. And sometimes I'd ask them because they have specialties I don't have. But that's what I think is missing.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I agree. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00:

If I if you're not able to be vulnerable with the people, like one trustworthy person, what's the point?

SPEAKER_02:

You know, yeah, because we also cannot do it all on our own. Like it's not possible.

SPEAKER_00:

Do you know anyone who's made it on their own?

SPEAKER_02:

No.

SPEAKER_00:

I don't either. I mean, everyone had someone. I think that that's you know, you know, maybe a good spot to talk a little bit about what you're doing right now because I think that for me, that's what you're doing. You're giving a lot of space for people to trust you and help them go where they need to be. And you're doing it in a very uh truthful and honest way. But you want to share a little bit of what you're doing right now?

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, well, I'm doing a few different things. Actually, you talk about mentorship. I have been um working with a couple of clients on building effective mentorship programs and like what does that mean? What does that look like? How are we training people to be effective mentors as well? Um, so that's one thing that I'm doing. I'm also working with people one-on-one through like in coaching. And and one thing I really think is so powerful is if you're working with a therapist and a coach, like I think that's just a beautiful cocktail. Um, for people who are not familiar with like what coaching is. Coaching is really about like, where are you now and where do you want to be? And how are we bridging the gap to get you there? And while we'll look at the past, because the past informs who we are now and who we will be, it's done in a very different way than therapy. And coaching, while it can feel very therapeutic, I'm not necessarily working on trauma stuff. And I'm more working on how are you learning, how are you taking what you're learning in therapy and all this other stuff and creating, creating a pathway for yourself to get where you want to be. Um, so yeah, and I come at it from a very holistic perspective. So I'm looking not just at what's going on in your brain, but also your body and your emotions. And and I'm trained in a specific framework called energy leadership. So it's all about how are you being a leader of your own life? And um, I I sometimes talk about it as being a really great emotional intelligence tool. But I also use this framework with teams and groups. So helping teams and groups to be more effective to navigate conflict and change and transition, which is just a thing about life in general. But right now we're our culture is going through a lot of change and transition. And so with that comes stress. And so how are we creating resilience? Right. So a lot of my work is on stress and resilience, and how can you create a lot of um tools for yourself and for others as both formal leaders and informal leaders? And then I do a lot of keynote speaking right now. And then I have I have a newsletter that I'd always love people to subscribe to. But I I write a, I guess you would call it bi-monthly, twice a month newsletter that really talks about some of the things that I'm like working through, but how that theme is showing up in client work or just things that I'm seeing. And I'm very my my philosophy is like, what are the tools that you can use that you can like start implementing right away? Because that's the other big thing about coaching that I would say is somewhat different than therapy, depending on the type of therapist you're going to is how are you taking forward action, right? Whether that's an internal thing or an external thing, but what is the thing that you're committed to to take action? And then how are you holding yourself accountable for that? So yeah, those are some of the things I'm doing right now. And always looking to chat with new people if you're if you're interested in in any of the type different sections or fields that I am dabbling in.

SPEAKER_00:

Stephanie is such a great guest and a great human being, and I truly appreciate her. Get her newsletter.

SPEAKER_02:

I'll link it in the show notes with her website, which is what uh Stephanie, my name, S-T-E-P-H-A-N-I-E-Simps, S-I-M-P-S O N dot com.

SPEAKER_00:

Go reach out to her, go get a newsletter because one of the things she undersold completely is her immense vulnerability in her newsletters, too. She talks about where she's at, she talks about the difficulties and the doubts and everything else. And to me, that's what makes it one of the newsletters I look most forward to because I see that all the time. And yes, she then goes into coaching and explains to you how it goes and then how you can contact her. But to me, we talked about vulnerability throughout this episode. But you didn't give yourself enough credit for that vulnerability that you offer both on Instagram and um your LinkedIn. And I think that that's would be if you want an example of being vulnerable, Stephanie is exactly there. And I really encourage you to go with that.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, thank you. I feel like that was one of the reasons I started the newsletter over a year ago was I was feeling like I wasn't getting to share in the way that felt authentic to me, especially online. And I also felt like I wanted more community and like how could I do that? And that was really the inspiration and motivation for the newsletter. So I'm glad to hear that that's resonating. And and thinking about the word vulnerability, like I really try to think about vulnerability as a strength and just like anything else, like a muscle to build the strength. You've you've got to be doing it yourself too. And and it doesn't mean, I mean, I'm trying to be better at strength training right now in life. And that doesn't mean that when I pick up those weights, that it's it gets a little easier depending on like how well I'm how consistent I am, but it's still heavy, right? And so it's still hard, it's still challenging. I'm still sweating by the end of it. And so I think about that in terms of vulnerability that like while doing it gets easier, it doesn't mean that it's super easy every time you're doing it, but it is a strength.

SPEAKER_00:

On that happy note, Steph, go to her website, go subscribe to her newsletter, but Stephanie Simpson from the bottom of my heart. Love you. Happy you came on, and I can't wait to have you hat on again.

SPEAKER_02:

Thank you. Love you too.

SPEAKER_00:

And maybe one day we'll be able to meet each other face to face.

SPEAKER_01:

I know that still hasn't happened.

SPEAKER_00:

Talk to you. And for those of you who are listening, uh, thank you very much for episode 229 and uh join us for episode 230. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01:

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